I'm sitting here and my emotions are taking over me, I can feel my anxiety building. The "countdown" has begun. There are 11 days until THAT day, the dreaded day, the one year anniversary of my husband's passing, the day that changed everything for me and all our family and friends. Today is one of … Continue reading The Countdown Has Begun To The One Year Anniversary Of My Husbands Death
I've never been a huge Valentine's Day person. I don't dislike the holiday, I just have never really cared much about getting flowers or gifts for it. I think it's a million times more special when you get flowers or a card/gift on a completely random day and then you know that your spouse/significant other … Continue reading You’re My Significant Otter – Valentine’s Day Without My Partner
After my husband passed away I took a little time off from work, about a month and a half. When it was time to go back I worried about a lot of things. You just can't imagine all the feelings that going back to work (and "normal" everyday life) brings up in a situation like … Continue reading Those Shaking Hands – The Struggles To Head Back To Work After Becoming A Widow
The "what-ifs", these are some of the hardest things to work through during the grief journey. It brings out regret, guilt and anger. Recently I had an appointment with a cardiologist to have a stress test performed. For those who don't know what that is, it's basically having pictures of your heart taken, then walking … Continue reading The “What-ifs” Can Eat At You After The Death Of A Loved One
So a few weeks ago I was watching a Friends episode, maybe you know it, it was the one where Monica and Chandler go talk to a pregnant woman who they might potentially adopt from. There is a moment when Chandler is talking to the woman alone and he says, "I love my wife more … Continue reading Grieving The Child We Never Got To Have
2016, the year everything changed. Last year when it struck midnight, as I kissed my husband, I thought this would be my first full year as his wife, I thought it would be the beginning of so many things for us. Instead this year was the ending of so much. On March 3 my husband … Continue reading 2016- The Year Everything Changed
This is a rough writing, one I don't plan to reread or correct after I write it so it may have some issues but I just had thoughts and feelings that needed to get out. I've been sitting here thinking about this past year. I know I already posted about it but I wanted to … Continue reading How Can Time Continue When The World Ended That Day?